motivation

I'm thinking about this lately for myself and the p'tit minous.

One of them is extremely self-motivated (I won't reveal which is which) and, I would say, has a high level of belief in his self-efficacy. He can plan his time, stick to a challenging job, and get things done. He is also skilled at motivating others, and has been since at least age 3, though to his chagrin in our stubborn family this can sometimes create resistance.

The other is in no hurry to assume the mantle of responsibility. We have almost daily arguments about his ability to accomplish tasks. He can argue passionately for what feels like hours, elaborating on all the many reasons that he can't do whatever the issue at hand is. Needless to say, as his mama, this is extremely frustrating.

It got me to thinking about my own levels of motivation and self-efficacy. I recently took an interesting online personality assessment as part of a nursing education class, and I discovered that while I have high levels of achievement orientation (no surprise there), my levels of self-efficacy and self-discipline were only average.

Procrastination my old friend....(cue Simon and Garfunkle)...
I think that my awareness of this issue makes me lack some belief in my ability to accomplish all the things I want to accomplish. And I am ready to change this. I declare this year the year of Anti-Procrastination. Or maybe the Year of Planning is a better moniker.

Building habits, setting small measurable goals, and rewarding myself are the tools.
I hope to help the stuggling p'tit minou by, instead of lecturing, giving him an example of an imperfect adult working to change sa way of doing things that is no longer working.

just things

When I set out jogging on Tuesday, I forgot I was still wearing my favorite pair of earrings. They are small and dangly, delicate, with amethysts. They were  bouncing in an irritating manner as I ran, so I took them off and tucked them in a zippered pants pocket with my keys.

When I got home and emptied my pockets before a shower, I heard a "clunk", the keys fell on the floot, and I realized there was a hole in my pocket. Only one earring was still in there. I was instantly swept with an intense feeling of disappointment. I loved those earrings! I wear them almost daily! I'll never find another similar pair! thoughts ran through my mind.

Then I stopped. I repeated to myself: They are just things. Just things. That's it. Yes, pretty things that I enjoy, but just things. And just like that, I let it go. Things come and go in our lives. Why do we invest so much emotion in them?

As I took my shower I contemplated what other items I might be able to part with given this revelation. I will tell you more about that at another time. Then I stepped out of the shower...and on to the missing earring.

I'm glad to have it back, for now, but even more glad for the occasion to think about things that are just things.

cake

I need some help here. But let me back up:

I have been working on fitness and (I think) doing a great job at being active.
For me, this is a pleasure and not a duty. It's necessary. It keeps me happy.
(Or at least even-keel). I find perspective. I release stress. I daydream.
I walk, I jog, I ride my bike to work. I do push-ups in the morning. Hurray! I love it.

I'm also happy to say that I always eat 5 fruits and veggies a day now. And sometimes 7.
Again, not hard to do. I like fruits and veggies. I live 4 blocks from a little neighborhood natural food store and a mile from a great supermarket. I have generous friends and neighbors who share their garden bounty this time of year. Our lot is full of and surrounded by fruit trees. Easy peasy.

Where I'm not doing so well health-wise....

is when it comes to eating cake. Or chocolate. Or ice cream. Or cheese.
I seem to be "on" or "off" when it comes to self-control, with very little reasoned room in the middle. Either I'm actively choosing not to consume those items (which, with a high cholesterol issue at my relatively tender (ahem) age I know I shouldn't), or I'm indulging without restraint. It isn't a healthy pattern, but I'm not sure how to break it.

Oddly, when we were in France this summer and surrounded by all kinds of delicious food, I felt much less tempted. I could enjoy bites of something, or taking a picture of it. I also felt more aesthetically fulfilled--the visual pleasure of being in a lovely place. And I had less stress. I was on vacation. It seems like the family dinner hour, when we reunite after the long day, is usually when the teenage p'tit minous choose to engage in some regularly scheduled sibling conflict. Which makes me automatically want to start finishing the ice cream.

(somewhat ironically, just as I was writing this, Minou came back from the store and put a chocolate button in my mouth.)

So, suggestions please!
How can apply the principles of minimalism--just enough and no more--to healthy eating and treats in moderation?

sunny day

• The rain is gone for now and I have a day at home during the week.
• Minou is upstairs drawing and pricing an attic renovation, from storage to sleeping loft.
• An architect must follow code, and Minou is a man of principles. We will have a permit.
• That attic was once full--and is now almost empty. Sigh of relief.
• My good friend and longtime former neighbor stopped by for coffee and sunflowers.
• She gifted me with a huge bowl of orange garden cherry tomatoes, and a bag of chard and kale for the simmering Italian potato-leek-bean-tomato soup on the stove.
• She is feeling more settled in her new home. And while I wish it were nearer to our home, I'm glad.
• I made whole wheat blueberry-apple muffins for the boys' after-school-and-ballet snack.
• First mammogram this morning: not painful at all. Whew!
• how was your day?

...and another thing....

Today's post (which I actually wrote last night) was timely, because I woke up to a grey, drizzly morning and wet clothes on the clothesline.

I did get on my bike and set out to work, but a couple of miles into my ride I was done with riding in the rain, unless I could acquire some little windshield wipers for my glasses.

So, I stopped downtown, wheeled my bike onto the rapid transit bus, and mulled over why the hefty $130 felt like such a good investment for this frugal mama. I usually hate spending money (every dollar spent is a dollar not going into the Roth IRA), but I feel well satisfied supporting my local transit company.

I'm investing in my community. Not only helping the environment, but helping keep the bus company afloat with my fees. If enough customers subscribe, it keeps rates low and routes open for non-driving populations who depend on public transportation: youth, the elderly, disabled riders, and low-income people.

here's what I need!
image source: http://www.freepatentsonline.com/6640379.html

bus pass

I just spent $130 dollars on something that I haven't used yet. What is it?
I bought a 3 month bus pass!

It felt like a lot of money up front, but it's a good investment in keeping my lifestyle car-light. At an average of $33 dollars monthly, it's still less expensive than one tank of gas. My health center just moved to a (beautiful) new site about 5-6 miles from my home. It's a great bike ride when the weather is good and the days are long. There's even a changing room and a shower at work if I get sweaty on the way. However....come the rainy, early fall evenings and mornings, I know I won't be so eager to wheel out my bike.

So, the bus pass gives me options, while providing incentive not to request a ride from Minou (we're a one car family, so he as the official p'tit minou-chauffeur has first dibs on the vehicle). After all, I paid for it, so I need to get some use out of it. The rapid-transit bus runs from the city center (about 2.5 miles from my home) right past the health center.

Having a bike and a bus pass allows for all sorts of alternative transportation combinations. I can bike downtown, hop onto the rapid transit line, then bike home. I can walk downtown to the bus station and then take the bus to work and back. I've even thought about jogging to work, then taking the bus home in the evening. The possibilities are good for my waistline, wallet, heart...and endless!

september evening

It seems I don't have much to say here these days.
Life continues on, changes are both with us and afoot.
Waiting for news and waiting for plans to be drawn
leading to a permit and more changes.
Routines and the coziness of home are a comfort.

Both my boys are back to school--
while this may be relief to some parents,
it's sad for me, as our overlapping schedules means
I see them much more seldom. We have breakfast together,
dinner, and a short hour or two of time, homework help, then bedtime.
On the weekend, there are movies together, bike rides, maybe ice cream.
I love the weekends.

Something about September, the early fall,
carries a melancholy sweetness. I look forward to it, and
I find this time of year so beautiful, the light, the leaves, the air,
...but then a sadness strikes. I miss the long days and energy of summer.

It takes all the seasons. This drawing inward is a good thing too.
My tiredness may be just of the body. I ran nine miles today!
I'm on a slow and steady plan, my new mantra for everything.
On November 17 I plan to run my second half marathon.
I feel inspired to start a new round of paring down of possessions.
Again, slow and steady.
It's funny how things cycle--

How is life with you these days?